Photo by Lea Kobal on Unsplash

The water spots on the ceiling are capable of being made into shapes if I squint just right. Sometimes it is a big elephant wandering the lands of Africa. Other times it is a ship sailing through a storm being tossed back and forth uncertain if the magnificent beast will last or be crushed under the pounding of the waves. Mostly though they just remind me of the spots from where the neighbors tub overflowed the night he killed himself.

You see I was sound asleep dreaming of floating down this river I had seen in a picture. Water so green and sparkly that I thought to myself no way is that real. The caption said Idaho, so I looked it up and sure enough it was a state on the other side of the country. The water was breathtaking.

In my dream I was jumping, swimming, floating, diving and looking at all the rocks. This was where I wanted to be, the freedom to move and be somewhat weightless. Suddenly, it started to rain even though it was the most brilliant blue sky I had ever seen. The hot sun was shining down through the pine trees, but raining right on my face. I wiped my face repeatedly. Only now the rain was getting stronger and was pouring down. Pretty soon it felt like I was drowning. I coughed and coughed again, it was then that I realize the water wasn’t from my dream, but that my bed was soaked.

As I scrambled out of my bed, I landed hard on the floor due to my leg being tangled in the covers. I flipped on the light to my small closet size bedroom, and I could see water pouring from the ceiling.

I yelled, “Mom! Mom!” I was expecting her to come help and explain why I had a waterfall in my room. I heard nothing from out on the couch so I continue to yell “Mom,” as I went to the living room.

There she was passed out with a needle in her arm and a bottle of whiskey shoved between her and the couch cushions.

“Mom! Mom!” I yelled, “Wake up it’s an emergency.”

All she did was push me back as she turned to face the back of the couch, “Fuck off I’m sleeping,” she yelled.

Realizing something needed to be done. I rushed across the hall and started banging on Mrs. Case’s door. Her hair was in those pink rollers, and she had her red robe on when she answered. “Do you know what time it is?”

“Sorry Mrs. Case I know I’m not supposed to bother you unless it’s an emergency.”

“Is your mom high again?”

“Yes, but that’s not the problem, you see it’s raining in my bedroom”

“Raining, what do you mean by raining?”

“My ceiling is raining water and my bed is all wet.”

“Show me please.”

I brought Mrs. Case to my bedroom and as we passed my mom, I could hear her just barely snoring. Once inside my room the water was a full stream now. My blankets and bed were just soaked. The water was spreading out onto the floor.

“We need to get upstairs and get this water to stop. Go knock on the door above and tell them the water is running in your room,” said Mrs. Case.

As I dashed up the stairs, I looked back and could see Mrs. Case just leaving my apartment.

It took her about 5 minutes to make it up the stairs. By the time she got up there, the neighbor in 302 had already called the cops. You see he heard me banging on the door and had came out yelling, “Hey kid it’s midnight, people are trying to sleep and here you are making all this noise.”

“Sorry,” I say, “I think there is something wrong because it is raining in my bedroom and Mrs. Case said I should come knock on this door.”

At that moment the man in 302 had a key in his hand and was putting it into the lock of the door I had been pounding on. “Stay here kid, and don’t fucking move,” said the man.

I stayed by the door until I saw Mrs. Case coming up the stairs. I went over and helped her up the rest of the way. The man from 302 says “The cops are coming. He is dead. I turned off the water. It’s a mess in there. Kid, you aren’t allowed in.”

The cops came and do what they do. I showed them my wet bed. They saw that my mom was on drugs, so they took her away too. Mrs. Case said she would get my clothes dried, because the cops ended up taking me with them.

I end up at Dan’s place, he said, “You can call me Dan and not Officer Keen. My wife made up the spare bedroom for you, so you’ll spend the night with us, until I can get you into Child Protective Services.”

I was so scared that first night. I thought it was all a bad dream, because when I woke up I saw the water spots on the ceiling. I ended up staying with Dan and Lynn, and I’ve been here for seven years now. They are great people and awesome parents. I see my mom about once a month, even less when she is high. It hurts, but there is love from these two people. That is all that matters.

I keep trying to talk Dan into repainting the ceiling, because sometimes I wake up confused and think it is raining. He says, “The only time it will rain in your room is if we have another leak in the roof.”

— Nicole Barden 12/27/2020

Originally published in Illumination on Medium